This popped into my Twitter feed just as I was reflecting on by inability to look after myself. During this year’s summer break, I resolved to do a number of things all centred around looking after myself.
I resolved to spend less time on social media (I even posted my intentions). I have to admit this has been difficult. It is my escape and I added to my social media load with #28daysofwriting. But this has been beneficial to me.
Then there was #100happydays. I did this to remind myself of the happy aspects of my day and to force myself to do something worthy of photographing everyday. To create a moment to stop and smell the flowers. I did great for 33 days, then I went back to work.
I resolved to sleep more. I averaged around 7.5 hours per night in the holidays and felt great. Now that I am back at work I have fallen back to 6 hours per night or less. I can maintain this for short bursts of time but I end up making myself sick. Hello vertigo and nausea my old friends.
I resolved to exercise, namely run. I was doing a minimum of 3 days per week, now I am back to 1. Part of the reasoning behind this was to lose weight, I’m carrying 10 kg more than I should. I have put on 2 so make that 12 kg more than I should.
I resolved to spend more quality time with my kids and husband. If not for the tickets to Billy Connolly I bought my husband for his birthday, this would not have happened this week. I have become completely absorbed my work.
So now I am sick and my family are on edge because they look to me to set the tone. My work has suffered and I am not operating at my best. I have failed again. Education is like a hard to kill parasite. It invades every aspect of my life and sucks all the energy and time out of it. But this is because I let it. I lose sight of what is important.
We are halfway through the term and I have failed. But I have also learned. I have learned that my work is not always a parasite. I do it because I love it. There is an element of symbiosis. I gain a great deal from what I do. I am passionate about it. It provides me with purpose and fulfilment. I have learned that I am the tipping point. It is me that tips the beast that is my job from beneficial to harmful. This term, I have recognised this at the half way mark, rather than the end.
Winning. Bring on mutualism: a relationship where each participant benefits from the activity of the other.